The complicated life of a brown Super Man

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I had a hilarious time reading the American outrage at  Nina Davuluri becoming Miss America. This started me thinking. What if this gets bigger, will the barbs get sharper. For example  whatif we had a brown superman. Would his life be messier? And heres this super list(created by a brown girl) on why a brown supermans life will be really complicated

  1. Have you faced security checks at USA? When they have so much problem with you flying in a plane, imagine the scare a brown man flying on his own can cause?
  2. So you thought the Arab barbs hurt. That would be nothing as compared with the ‘barbs’ this guy would face
  3. Bird or planeHis red cape would be mistaken for a fancy red sari and security protocols in Amreeka dictate everyone in a sari, including ambassadors and supermen must be thoroughly searched.
  4. He couldn’t have an American girl friend- Americans would think this a ploy to get a green card and the Indians would think that’s a ploy to trap their good, desi boy
  5. A good Indian wife would never tolerate a husband flying in and out of windows
  6. A good Indian mom would feed him ghee ki puris and besan ke laddoo everytime he flies in. Unless he would be in no shape to fly out
  7. The whole underwear over pants thing would get really messy in tropical weather
  8. Everyone from Shahrukh Khan to Virat Kohli would come and given him complex about his brown skin unless he secretively went to buy a Fair and handsome tube
  9. If the fairness ads are to be believed, he would not have the girls drooling over him. Whats Superman without the super girls?
  10. His wings would be clipped. Imagine in a country that clips RTI, what ruckus a flying surveillance man would cause. They would amend the constitution to ban flying men.
  11. In Bengal, there would be an all party bandh- Superman causing inefficient havildar to lose jobs
  12. The left would protest the FDI in aviation – Foreign Direct ideasuperman in Delhi
  13. The right would worry  at small us annoying big US
  14. Finally the only one left supporting Superman is Arnab Goswami. Or Ram jethmalani
  15. After being grilled for an hour on India wants to know how you fly – Superman would give up and become a godman
  16. His dad would rather him have a flying career than a flying son
  17. His would be in law would ask him- Woh sab toh thik hai but kamate kitne ho?
  18. In a country where the  .9 billion don’t know anything about flying, people would protest his special status
  19. A panchayat would probe and probe his caste. Are XYX caste allowed to fly?
  20. He would be hired to fly politicians during election times
  21. And if he still had time left he would be asked to give the ministers babies and babas joyrides- man! Some bribe toh banta hai for letting you fly
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